OhNoOo!

A list of things you absolutely, must not, ever, rhyme with or say in a rhyme:

  • Life, knife, strife, wife
  • People/steeple
  • “Tight like a virgin”
  • Lyrical/miracle/emperical – piss off
  • Rap/wrap – presence/presents wordplay
  • “Got more bars than prisons” or something similar eg “More bars than Alcatraz”
  • Using gun bars when you are a bedroom MC, or indeed any MC really
  • ‘So hot i melt the wax’ or so cool I something something = generic
  • Anything pork/bacon and muslim-related is a bit done now as well
  • Smoke you like a cigarette/spliff/blunt – blearghhh
  • Meditate/elevate/levitate
  • Words ending with “ation”
  • Gettin’ higher than a (insert high/tall thing here)
  • I’m sick like…(I’ve got a cold/chlamydia/athlete’s foot etc)
  • Your bars are too weak like a fortnight, or weak like seven days or argh
  • “lyrical” as simile modifier e.g. “lyrical bullets” etc. (lyrical creams)
  • Rappers who drop similes then pause or emphasise the end of the bar like it’s the most amazing and profound thing ever uttered eg. i got bars…Armley prison.
  • Mans don’t know about my hustle except that presumably now an uncommonly large amount of people do know about my hustle as I took the time to mention it in excruciating detail in a rap.
  • Swag…in any context
  • Generalising about how hard it was growing up in “X” area is the worst kind of stating the obvious
  • Rapping the alphabet through and counting, especially 1, 2, buckle my shoe etc
  • Anyone that emphasizes the last word on a bar with a pitched up/down repeat
  • Rhyming “funny” and “money” and “honey”. My God man.
  • “City” “pity” “shitty” is horrific
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